The Assassin

I've created a new blog for my assassin story. So from now on I won't be posting it on here, I'll be posting it on here.

Go check it out. Cheers dudes.

more "art"

A lady with her head back


A lady with her knickers down


A book

The Assassin part 1 (illustrated)

I thought my Assassin story would work quite well as a graphic novel. However I'm not very good at drawing so here's a storyboard of part 1. If any good drawers want to help me out it'd be much appreciated (worth a try isn't it?)





So there you go. What do you think?

Is it art?

Here's some of my pics.

But is it art?



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So that's that. I may add more

Chip Shop Crew

There is a phenomenon I’ve noticed in Scotland (it might not be just Scotland but that’s where I’ve noticed it).

This phenomenon I’ve decided to call the “chip shop crew” phenomenon. Basically it goes like this, any chip shop that you go into has a remarkably similar staff structure.

There will be the boss man, the guy that operates the fryer and runs the show. He will always be a middle aged man and more often than not he will have no hair (some kind of natural selection process to ensure hygiene perhaps?).

There will be the real boss, a middle aged lady with a face so tough it looks like it was carved in granite by a naturally angry sculptor in a bad mood with a blunt chisel.

There will be a young but overweight and unattractive lady who is in charge of the dolly birds.

Then there are the dolly birds. There will be between 1 and 6 teenage girls with above average looks (though the constantly bored expression spoils this somewhat) serving the customers and dishing out the chips. Their styled hair, expensive jewellery and carefully applied make up are off set perfectly by their chewing gum grey overalls and dismissive nature.

Now and again there will also be a godfather figure in the chip shop. He will be an ancient man, probably over 80 years old and under 5 feet tall, who, although dressed for work, wanders about the place getting in everybody else’s way.

Don't just take my word for it though, check it out for yourself. Visit any chip shop in Scotland and you will see the Chip Shop Crew.

The Assassin part 4

Sitting on top of the building opposite the targets apartment the assassin opened his case.

He quickly assembled his high powered sniper rifle, screwed on the silencer then clicked the scope into place.

He got into position and took a first look through the scope into the targets apartment, the target was laying awkwardly on his bed, his head at a funny angle. Just as he was adjusting the focus on his scope a figure came into view in the window.

It was him, Matthew Erics. He was also an assassin, apparently the best in the business. If you were rich and powerful enough and you wanted the job done guaranteed then you’d call Erics. Kramer planned to put a stop to this.

He was close behind Erics, very close and Erics knew it, which was probably why he was stealing his clients. This wasn’t the first time he’d stolen one, but if Kramer had anything to do with it, it’d be the last.

He quickly put the rifle back in its case and ran down the stairs to confront Erics.

Overheard

This is a part of a conversation I overheard in Subway between two young guys in suits.

Suit 1 "I'd totally ride her."

Suit 2 "HER!?"


Suit 1 "Yeah, what's up with her? She's very pleasant looking."

Suit 2 "My point exactly. You don't 'totally ride' (accompanied by fingers in the air quote mark gesture) someone who's pleasant looking."

(pause)

Suit 1 "Fair enough." (pause) "Ok then, I'd totally let her ride me."

Suit 2 "Yeah, me too."

G20

No not that G20, the other G20, Maryhill.



There are two schools in Maryhill that have been threatened with closure so some of the parents have snuck into the schools and are staging a sit in protest.

These parents have strong feelings over the school closures for a number of reasons, nostalgia not being the strongest one.

If these schools are closed then the children will be relocated to other schools much further away.

I have a personal interset in this situation myself as my son would be going to one of these schools after the summer.

The biggest problem for me is that the school he'd be getting moved to isn't going to allow parents to pick up the kids at the school but at a designated safe area in Asdas car park.

They're expecting a load of school kids to walk safely from the school to a supermarket carpark, crossing a busy main road.

It's a whole load of ridiculous nonsense.

Heatwave!

It's warm in Glasgow. So warm in fact I've taken my jumper off!

I don't think I've experienced such a warm day in April before. But anyway enough of me wittering on about the weather like I've got nothing better to say...erm...yes.